Milestones

June 30 marked the milestone when the website with camera on eagles nest in Decorah Iowa shut down for the year..three eaglets are on their way to adulthood, one with a transmitter on her back!

No longer will I sit in on robe at 7:30 a.m. watching the antics of these growing creatures.

Another major  milestone passed last Monday:  My first wedding anniversary as a widow.  Of course I had a lot of downward spirals leading up to it, and even tried to plan ahead—a quiet day in the woods, maybe.  Then a friend suggested that might not be safe for a woman alone.  What is safe?  I finally settled on a few hours at Sunset Gardens, an enclosed but open garden in Menlo Park.  In fact, as I sat on a bench writing in my journal, I looked up to see some plants directly across from me—ones I had been looking for.  So that brought me back into the ‘real ‘world again and I set off to track them down at a plant  nursery.  As it turned out, I found something similar the end of the week, at another location. All this, plus two hours with the sign company, are coming together to finish off a memorial fountain at our church courtyard in memory of Roger.

Another milestone of sorts:  some old friends from Australia came by to visit on their SF stopover; then on to a wedding and the UK.  I had not seen them  since we had moved into this seniors community, so I spent a fair amount of time stowing away paperwork, making the apartment presentable for guests.  I held myself together throughout the meeting, but it took it’s toll later in the week.

Now it’s a new month, a new set a goals, perhaps new milestones.  Soon it will be the one year milestone since Roger’s death. Those of you who have been reading this know by now this is not a cheerful ” oh, I’m doing well” blog but the unvarnished truth of my daily and weekly struggles. The moments that go well are only by the grace of God.  The ones that go badly are partly inevitable, partly a continuing expression of ‘the fullness of sorrow and loss’ as someone said. There are comforts along the way, but I’m still  learning where the rocky places are.